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A year ago, when I still worked at Commander's Palace, I opened my… - I wish everyone was as smart as me.

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March 23rd, 2009


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03:59 pm
A year ago, when I still worked at Commander's Palace, I opened my first bottle of Dom Pérignon.

Whenever I introduce myself to a table that's celebrating something, I bring the wine list with me and ask if they would like to begin the evening with Champagne. Admittedly, I said it in such a manner that the subtext was "You'll buy it if you love her," but I never imagined he would choose Moët et Chandon's Prestige Cuvee.

"Oh, it's that type of party," I silently realized. This guy, his wife, and their six-year-old daughter immediatlly became my only priority. I wasn't going to let the wine-runner, or even my front-waiter handle the bottle. No one would touch it but me.

I retrieved it from the wine cellar briskly and silently. As I presented it, my gestures were grandiose and theatrical.

"Sir, the 1998 Rosé."

He nodded, before he looked into her eyes, "The year we were married."

I placed it in the bucket next to him and removed my wine-key from my rear right pocket. Now, I've opened hundreds of champagne bottles, but none of them were ten years old. The instant I cut the foil away, the cork flew into the ceiling and pink foam arced directly into his daughter's face. His eyes and lips narrowed furiously. "Oh, God," I thought. "I'm fucking fired and I look like a jackass."

As quickly as I could, I covered the top of the bottle with my serviette, but she had already been soaked by the $450 bukkake. She waved her hands emphatically above her head as she screamed, "YAYYYYYYYYY!"

I guess she thought it was suppose to happen that way.

The dining room exploded into laughter and applause. It was so adorable, the father couldn't stay mad with me. They ended up coming back and requesting my services on several other occasions before I left.

(20 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments:


[User Picture]
From:hereisfar
Date:March 23rd, 2009 09:02 pm (UTC)
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That is HILARIOUS.
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From:shinga
Date:March 23rd, 2009 09:05 pm (UTC)
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LOL, awesome.
[User Picture]
From:jezekel
Date:March 23rd, 2009 09:11 pm (UTC)
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lmao
[User Picture]
From:thewebmistress
Date:March 23rd, 2009 09:13 pm (UTC)
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This made me laugh SO much
From:bwadayagafigi
Date:March 23rd, 2009 09:27 pm (UTC)
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Great story.
[User Picture]
From:ladyjaja
Date:March 23rd, 2009 10:48 pm (UTC)
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oh that's a great story!
it made me smile!
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From:thatsevenbetter
Date:October 11th, 2010 09:17 pm (UTC)
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adding you, btw
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From:planet_x_zero
Date:March 12th, 2012 11:40 pm (UTC)
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are you a professional sommelier? i was considering it as a career change a while back - how do you like it?
[User Picture]
From:nightninja76
Date:March 12th, 2012 11:48 pm (UTC)
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Yeah, I am. Unless there's such thing as professional boob masseuse, I have the best job there is! I spend every day discussing and tasting the most interesting thing there is.

If you like, I can offer advice and answer any questions.
[User Picture]
From:planet_x_zero
Date:March 13th, 2012 12:05 am (UTC)
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Yes, definitely. Thank you. i guess the main question would be the training. i have a reasonable knowledge and love of wine, but not enough to work professionally - well, the love yes, the knowledge no.

Are the courses at, say, American Sommelier or another organization worthwhile, or would it be time better spent going out and trailing a sommelier at a well-regarded restaurant? And secondly, how important is certification? Any info you can share would be very much appreciated.

Also, I had looked into professional boob masseuse but I found I could only get volunteer work. In other news it appears we both live in Brooklyn.
[User Picture]
From:nightninja76
Date:March 13th, 2012 12:13 am (UTC)
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Do you use gmail, aim, or some other instant messenger? I feel like this would be more appropriate as a real-time conversation.

In fact- and I don't want you to feel pressured- if you're just sitting on your computer at home like I am right now, you want to meet somewhere to chat over a glass of vino?

Edited at 2012-03-13 12:46 am (UTC)
[User Picture]
From:planet_x_zero
Date:March 13th, 2012 05:07 pm (UTC)
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Thanks. I've had it off for a while but i'll turn it back on and pm you my screen name. Last night was not so good, but I would be up for a glass in person.
[User Picture]
From:antiheroine
Date:March 22nd, 2012 11:39 pm (UTC)
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wait so do you... not really make posts? ಠ_ಠ
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From:nightninja76
Date:March 23rd, 2012 12:01 am (UTC)
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I used to, but I haven't since... three years ago, apparently. I don't remember when, but I went through all my old posts a while ago and deleted most of them because I was embarrassed about how petty/silly/obnoxious I used to be. I regret it now.

There's something I think I'd like to make an entry about soon though and I was actually thinking I'd like to start writing you.
[User Picture]
From:antiheroine
Date:March 23rd, 2012 12:02 am (UTC)
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do these things your heart desires!

also gurl you look at my okc profile an awful lot ;x~.
[User Picture]
From:nightninja76
Date:March 23rd, 2012 12:24 am (UTC)
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Hahahahahaha, I rarely close tabs so whenever I restart firefox it probably registers as another hit.
[User Picture]
From:antiheroine
Date:March 23rd, 2012 12:25 am (UTC)
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oh! i see. YOU TAKE SO LONG TO REPLY. GET TO MAKIN' THAT POST.
[User Picture]
From:antiheroine
Date:March 23rd, 2012 12:02 am (UTC)
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and actually now i'm gonna be all impatient for your ~new entry~ so thanks for the suspense :'(
[User Picture]
From:nightninja76
Date:March 23rd, 2012 12:25 am (UTC)
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You'll get a personal letter before that. Your gmail is on the facebook?
[User Picture]
From:antiheroine
Date:March 23rd, 2012 12:27 am (UTC)
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yep, gmail shown on fb. you have lots of work to do, then!

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